Women who suffer abuse

For sometime now, I have been offering support to a good friend of mine who was undoubtedly in an abusive relationship. Having known other similar situations in the past, I started giving her support.She is safe now and is planning her future life. But I know that not many women have that option. Many are stuck in bad relationships. Makes me wonder,where is the justice?

These are regular women like me who work,got married with regular expectations and were ready to put in their share of the effort to make the marriage work. But they were unable to 'work at it' because of regular verbal abuse and sometimes even physical abuse/intimidation. Hard to believe that the men involved in this kind of abuse are professionals- civil servants, engineers, doctors and academicians. the fact that it is a kind of 'silent abuse' - he is your husband and this is a family and one must maintain the family honour - makes it doubly deadly.

I have read all about how the abuse is an expression of power over the vulnerable but I am more interested in how to get women out of these situations. Because, to think that the abuse will stop will be unrealistic.I found quite a few weel established,good helplines in the UK but none in India-at least on the internet.But there were contact details of various women's organizations and that is a start.

My friend and I were discussing about the same issue yesteday and she told me that there were studies to say that patterns of violent behavious against your family are inter-generational- meaning it carries forward to the next generation.Then we discussed about how it is very important that children see positive patterns of behaviour when they are young.A good thought,isn't' it?

The whole episode also reminded me of one of landmark theatre production by Eve Ensler- the Vagina Monologues. I haven't seen the play but have the read the book. A MUST for every woman who wants to 'look at the broader picture' and, for men who want to get a better insight into the stuff women go through in different parts of the world (including their own mom/sister/girlfriend/wife).

To be in a world where women don't have to fear for their safety.....hmmm.....perfect!!